I just finished Ginny and Georgia, and my gen z sister made fun of me when she knew I watch Ginny and Georgia because gen z says it’s “cringe” but honestly fuck gen z for labeling everything I find meaningful as cringe because that show is powerful. My favorite moment of the show? When Georgia finds out that Ginny burns herself and Georgia breaks down in front of Ginny telling her: “give it to me, okay? You give all that pain to me. I can handle it.”
And I’m kind of okay with the episode finale, to a point I was kind of hoping it’s the season finale but apparently they are already in the making of a new season. I’m not big for sad shows and a lot of crying, but I absolutely love shows with powerful mental health messages, shows that portray mental issues as the way they are without sugarcoating. For example, I really expected the writers to write off Marcus’s depression as something that was healed by a deep talk or a morning sunshine, but they didn’t, and it was so emotional to see how much he struggled, and how much everyone around him struggled because they wanted to help but didn’t know how, and they wanted to to understand but they couldn’t. And how badly he wanted to get better.
Anyway. I am trying to get better myself, I promise. I worked out (!) this morning and took a shower, and started completing my humanitarian learning module for this week. I tried out all the clothes I got in the past few days, and put on new nail polish. I am even writing all this down to document it, and now I’m going to get the birthday cake of my baby nephew who’s turning two today, and then heading off to my sister’s to celebrate him.
Update, I just got back from my sister’s, and it was nice. We got him so many presents and a cake with an excavator icing and he was just over the moon. He was so shy when we sang him happy birthday, and he kept asking us to light the candles so he can blow them off, and he kept putting grapes on his cake. It was nice, I just wish I could enjoy it without the lump.
It keeps getting bigger, and the bigger it is the heavier I feel, the harder for me to smile, the more painful for me to navigate. I need it to go away, I am doing everything I can to make it go away, but this time it’s just so stubborn, this time it’s so painful.
“I am all the days
That you choose to ignore”
This is a lyrics from a song I keep singing whenever I am feeling this way. It gives me comfort, though it is melancholy. You know what it says after it says I am all the days that you choose to ignore?
“You’re all I need”
and then a music solo.