But this time, I’m happy. I woke up to a text that made it all okay. I woke up at 5:30am and I smiled to myself.
And I couldn’t sleep again because I keep thinking of it, everything. And right now I’m smiling again just remembering. What an odd feeling that is, to be happy because of a word, a gesture, a sense of hope?
Anyway.
I’ve grown to love car cruises. They are a pause from the destinations, from the action, from life at the end of the tunnel. To be moving, unable to work or be as productive, just a small break before we’ll have to go on again,
I love that feeling.
Car cruises have been my favorite thing to do for years; I always ask for a car cruise as a gift for my birthday. And a car cruise doesn’t have to be so hard; we don’t even need to be talking, loud music, and fast speed are I all need to be happy.
Yesterday I had one of those really nice car cruises. Even though there wasn’t any music, but my company was beautiful. We talked and talked and we drove through sunset and the wind was cold. Imagine. Cold air in the middle of this hell weather we have been living in. Nour could not hide her joyful heart.
I’ve had a tough week to say the least, with a sleepless night and a panic attack at 5:30am on Friday, and seeing their beautiful faces yesterday smiling back at me with all the sprinkles and rainbows in the world, it made me feel the grace I thought I have lost last week.
They’re my heroes and I don’t think they know this , but they have saved me so many times from so much pain and anxiety and depression. They’re my heroes.